As some know, I accepted a scholarship that requires me to dedicate four years to teaching once I graduate. To be honest, I applied for the scholarship only for the money. I was fearful that I wouldn't have been able to pay for school without it, so I told myself that teaching would be a decent road to go down. I regret this decision to some extent because I feel that I would more enjoy a different major or some other field of study. But without taking this scholarship, a lot of things wouldn't have happened like they have. I probably would have never attended UNC-A which would have led to not being involved in Campus Crusade. I've grown a lot, spiritually, because of this organization. I would have never met all these great people and would have never been apart of the music with Cru, like I have. My buddy, Randy, who I met through Cru, has pushed me musically, and I believe that if it were not for him, I would not have pursued music like I have. There's no doubt that I would still have loved music just as much if none of this had happened, but I wouldn't be where I am now. I seriously doubt that I would have never been able to find myself in a studio working on tunes like I have gotten to here lately. I've said all this to say that I'm unsure of how things are going to look after I graduate, but I believe that God has chosen to use my music and that I am going to patiently wait on His guidance. If I have to teach for a while, so be it. I've decided to give up worrying and trust Him. People have been telling me for a long time that "my time will come." I guess it's about time I listen to that. It's hard to be patient sometimes but I'm praying that God will show Randy and I what to do and where to go and what to say, etc. to impact the world with our music (more on that below).
Going back to the conversation with my friend: I was asked 'why' I wanted to pursue music rather than teaching. My answer to this question has always been "because that's what I would rather do" or "I want to change the world with my music." Well, I started by answering with the "change the world" answer and then I got to thinking about how exactly I do want to change the world. I want to impact the world like Jesus would have. Now, I know that I could never ever do as good a job as He could have, but I'm going to let him live through me so that I can do as much humanly possible to better this place that I can. I want to show the world that there's more to live for than the dream that us, Americans, are so ambitious for. And that love shouldn't be so empty and vain like the way our culture models. I believe that selfishness is the main issue here. We shouldn't live to always serve ourselves. If we're striving for this selfish American dream, then we aren't caring about the poverty in the world and the number of people who are dying without knowing about Christ. The same goes with love. We loosely use the word and when it's used, there's no real meaning behind it. Most of the time, "true love" in relationships is paired with sex and the physicality of the relationship and the selfish desires that go along with it. If the world really loved like we were intended to love, then this would be the last thing on our minds. However, media, the internet and all our friends have brainwashed us into believing that love is something less than it is. Love, I believe, is one of the most important things in life. We shouldn't allow love to be diluted to today's standards. Let's make this thing real again. Love everybody sincerely and let's not abuse this word. Love will never fail and if we choose to love for real then what harm can be done.
Love: Romans 12:9-21
